Wednesday, January 26, 2011

All the same.

First it was 3rd September, now its 25th January.

I've had my heart broken so many times. I sound like a whiny bitch, i know. But this time round its very different.

He was everything that i asked for. Patient, understanding, has abit of humour, some arrogance. The one that i had hopes for. 18 months i spent, waiting and waiting, yet nothing came out of the 18 months.

Everytime i look at Shrek i see you.

As i rode down BKE, i was bawling my eyes out. Vision started to blur, i didn't know where i was going, even though i had a destination. My heart was broken by you, the very sight of you holding her hand.

I hate the fact that you are constantly on my mind, no matter what i do. Even the bus stop at Newton brought you back to my mind. I skipped traffic lights while riding, because my vision was too fucked to see anything beyond 20m.

I hate you.

You caused me agony, pain, hurt, frustration, disorientation, loss, anger and sorrow.

I just want to go into a hole, curl up and cry till my eyeballs turn purple. I have that much pain. I gave you my world, just like how i gave every other person i had feelings for. You crushed that world, the same like all the rest.

ALL OF YOU DID THE SAME THING.

I hate all of you. I hate myself.

Just let me die.
Just let me die.

Let the pain flow. Drown me with my own tears.


Cry till the world ends.